The Hedonistic Hippie

Just Another Manic Monday

31-01-2011

It’s the third day I have sore muscles and I can’t wait till I go back to the gym and box. I feel guilty for eating 2 cups of rice today (my required intake is just 1 cup). And so far, I’ve drank less sodas. Although I cooked and ate eggplant fritters yesterday, it was fried so it’s not at all healthy. I just wanted to eat vegetables.

Despite the issue at work where they did not fulfill crediting out REAP (some sort of incentive plan for retention, attendance and productivity), everything’s well. They promised to credit it within the week. I need that money as an advance payment for 10 sessions. They better give us that or else, because I can smell the pungent odor called mass resignation.

Have a Happy Monday y’all.

+++ Of Good Vibes and Bad Vibes +++

A few weeks ago, I was having the worst time of my life, I was not happy at work hence my countless absences. I was demotivated and I felt so fugly. 

I told my friends about it and got good advices. It was worsened when I had a falling out with my (ex) bff. It was just a petty thing actually, we were supposed to meet up and go to Ryu’s place as group then she bailed on me the last minute saying she and Julian (whose sabbatical stint I don’t buy) will go ahead and will just see us at Ryu’s. I got mad, not because she was with Julian but because she bailed out of the original plan, after she told me she’ll be meeting me earlier than  the agreed time, it seemed she knew this the whole time and made me wait, and made me looked stupid when I could’ve just gone and see The Green Hornet. I got mad. She has to understand that not everything is about Julian, who is he anyway?

It’s been a week and nothing’s happened, I went to work and tried hard to rechannel my energy. It paid off, albeit hard as I am a very cynical person. Concentrating on the positive things made me forget that M and I were not in good terms. But the workweek ended well.

Besides, my long withstanding problem with the PC not recognising my iPod as a device finally paid off when a NFF (new found friend) at work advised me to try using the USB port at the back of the CPU, it worked alright and I was kept busy converting songs for my CDs and ultimately uploading to Max. Over-all,  the memory’s from 13gb to 18gb and counting.

I ended the work week in higher than usual spirits, until I saw J’s post in FB last Friday he implicitly implied that somebody is a “pain in the ass” which I reckon was me. I may be paranoid, but not callous. The thing is I am at a dead end; if i react, they’d think I’m guilty, if I don’t, I am insensitive. As part of my plan to get rid of all the negative vibes, I unfriended them in FB. Yeah sure, it’s not the best move and very immature but heck, I’d rather that than read status posts whose indirectly implying it is me.

Why would J post that when he is not directly involved? His case was a separate issue which isn’t a big deal, but he wants to get involved (nakikisawsaw) then so be it. Yes, I burnt bridges.

This wasn’t easy though, I felt really bad. But a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do. Met up with Ryu so I can diffuse and it helped.

Saturday morning is boxing day. Originally planned to have M with us but because of the incident, it was just Noy and I. It was great. Natural high. It was the best feeling after going on hiatus for 2 years.  

Losing 2 people I consider friends is tragic but shit happens.

I keep Porna in the loop although I haven’t told her the whole story. After all, she was the one who told me about changing my outlook in life, her transformation is admirable. She’s happy to know of this change i am undertaking. We have to meet one of these days, I miss the laughter and the conversations. 

My only wish for now is for me not to encounter negativities, it is inevitable but just not some heavy shit for now. I vow to work on this.

I await the IJP team’s response to my application. I shall box after the body pain subsides. I shall be happy and stay focused in positivity.

I want to get a facial in Dermstrata and I hope to do it with Noy.